Let it Go

I wrote this on August 17, 2016 and I’ve decided to post it here as a reminder for myself. 

Can I keep it real? I struggle with this these days. 

It’s been over a year since my accident and I’m still very angry about it. I’m angry that I worry about my next step with my left leg, “is this the step that sends me deeper into darkness?” Angry that the guy who caused it doesn’t know or care what’s happened to me. Crazy as it is, I am the only one being hurt, with my holding one it this. I have begun taking steps to get to acceptance of my new normal, whatever that looks like. The quicker I get there, the better I’ll be…..correction. The quicker I get there the better the Merlau Four will be. #KeepItReal #BeMore #ReadySetGrow

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2 year anniversary – cycling accident

August 2nd, 2016
As of 7:40am cst, time clocked the second anniversary of an event that changed my life. I certainly did not expect to fall off my bicycle, knock myself out and seemingly send myself into a tailspin that continues today. My wife and I are forever grateful for my guardian angel Adam and his wife Angela for taking care of stuff that day! 
I have not been back on my bicycle since the accident and there are any number of reasons for that. I will get back in the saddle as soon as my body allows that to happen. 

Who knew that mile 28 of a 60 mile ride would change the course of life so drastically? Another way to look at it is this one event didn’t change the course, but when I add the additional things that continued to happen the course of my life was changing. The bottom line is that I had a choice to become bitter or better because of it. I would love to tell you that I had made the right choice all along but that’s not the truth. The truth of the matter is I did get bitter, I did get angry, no I got very angry and mad at the world. That decision helped nothing and only made the healing process longer. I’ve turned that around. 

Things are looking up and 

             I am growing forward into the person God made me to be.